Miss you.

Lost one three years ago, lost another eight months ago.

Most of the time, I don't think about it.

I've picked up the pieces and started a new puzzle of my life.

It feels like forever ago and it doesn't bother me.

But sometimes, I lose it.

Tonight is one of those times where it feels like yesterday.

I left both of you for friends at the worst timing possible.

I wasn't actually with either of you when I lost you.

I didn't get to hug you, knowing that was it, or kiss you goodbye.

I still have so many questions for both of you.

I feel like there was so much more for me to learn about each of you.

More memories to speak fondly of and more memories to make.

When laying on a hammock looking at the stars and satelites with one, and when laying on a hammock looking at trees and glass squirrels with the other, I had two of the happiest days of my life.

I can't hug either of you.

Play with either of you.

Laugh with either of you.

Talk to either of you.

See either of you.

I can't tell either of you that

I love you and

I miss you.

And I can't thank either of you for making moments of my life beautiful.